Perspective – You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good. ~Joseph

It will happen. Bad things happen to good people all the time. What is our perspective on the bad things happening to us? If we have enemies, backstabbers, and nay-sayers, we can say to them, "Beware. Good will come." It’s a matter of perspective.

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.” (Gen. 50:20, NLT).

Unpacking the Pastor’s Workload: 7 Tips for Women to Help Out

All hands on deck! The job is big and the pastor can’t do it alone. Women can help unpack the pastor’s workload and make a powerful impact in the lives of those in the community and the church. As I mentioned in the previous post, Partnership with Pastors, I have a desire to help the ministries of the church be effective in their mission. The following is part two of that post and lists seven tips for women ministering to women. Ladies, you can do this.

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1. Realize you have something to offer. A listening ear. Wise counsel. Party planning. Training expertise. Organizational skills. Bake and Take friendship talent. You can always offer relationship to women who need relationships.
2. Pray for a discovery of where you can help both in the community and in the church.
3. Look for opportunities to serve women by determining their needs
4. Communicate your availability and interest in helping your pastor reach the women of the church and community. Be sure to express your intentions of strengthening the church and families.
5. Ask the leadership, pastor, or women’s ministry leader, what needs they see and how your skills and talents can help meet those needs.
6. Learn the skills necessary to become more useable. Be teachable and always adapting to changes.
7. Believe that God can use you to make a difference in the lives of others. No task is too small to make an impact, nor too big for you to do your part.

You can make a difference. With so many needs in our communities and churches, you have a great opportunity to assist life change by joining others and partnering with pastors.

* photo from www.jrscience.wcp.muohio.edu.

Due to the response of Twittering Church, I’ve been questioning men to get their input on how twitter could help a men’s accountability group.

My husband suggested creating “Rules of Engagement.” Obviously, since twitter is social, the opportunity to a small accountability group is available.

But before I make suggestions for “Rules of Engagement,” I want to describe how I could see twitter working for a small group.

I have a small group that can be mimicked.  My group is my family. My husband and two older children twitter along together. We set our “devices” to “on” so we can see what each other are doing when we post.

My husband may tweet something about being frustrated at work, or how he had an awesome lunch meeting with someone. My kids may tweet “About to take a hard test,” or “Not feeling so hot today.” One may say something funny. One may ask via direct message (dm) for a deep prayer concern.

We laugh making no response. We pray for something mentioned. We respond with encouragement. We direct message our love, concern, and jokes directly into their circumstances in real time. (On a side note, my honey and I send “love” tweets too. Maybe I should write an article on how twitter can help your marriage.)

“Devices” are our cell phones that receive text messages. Twitter sends their tweets to our phones as a text message and we can respond via text messages in three manners.

1. A straight forward response goes to any and all who look at your twitter page on the internet and not directly to the one you want to respond to. Okay, but has the opportunity to be confusing to others not following along in the conversation.
2. Using @twittername (placing the name of the twitterer you want to respond to after the @ symbol) sends it to your twitter page for all to see as well as a community notice of saying it to your intended person.
3. Using d twittername sends a personal message directly to your intended person without posting your message to the social network. (A glitch may accidentally happen in twitterdom. I don’t advise getting too personal here. It may be a way to say, “Hey, call me at ###-####,” or “I got your back on this one.”)

There are more advanced methods such as creating groups and using hashtags (#), but the simple texting method keeps our family digitally connected and involved in one another’s life. I believe if your group creates “Rules for Engagement” and commits to increased digital accountability, twitter will greatly enhance your group.

(Twitter just hit Time Magazine’s front cover. Twitter is changing our culture. I really think the church ought to be involved and engaged in such awesome conversations.)

Twitter “Rules for Engagement” for group accountability and encouragement.

1. Meet face to face regularly – Keep your regular meeting times. Smiles, handshakes, and the necessary “three pat” hugs shouts concern to a much greater degree than the digital connection. Twitter cannot replace this! (Incidentally, I applaud each and every man willing to invest in another man’s life in small accountability groups. My husband has been in and started several over the years.)
2. Keep the most personal discussion personal in the face-to-face meetings. Never know when you might slip and forget to “dm” that detail resulting in shouting something meant “secret” to all internet eyes. And Twitter may accidentally put a “dm” in the main stream for everybody to see.
3. Commit to be involved in one another’s life making an effort to be an encouragement. Don’t make all the tweets self-centered. Send out encouraging quotes, Bible verses, and tidbits of learning you’ve received from your life struggles, as well as the what’s-going-on-with-you kind of tweets. If you’ve read an interesting article online, send a link using the link shortening tool in TweetDeck along with a short description of the article for your group to read. (TweetDeck.com and other applications are free downloads for your computer to make Twitter even more functional.

 I welcome more input, especially from men who twitter and are a part of a small accountability group. Please respond for the edification of all.

Founder and speaker of iGETitLIFE, Robin Bryce and her pastor/husband Chuck present "He Said, She’s Sad" No wait that’s "He Said, She Said" a topic on marriage at Central Cities Church in Copperas Cove, TX in the center of the greater Ft. Hood area. If you’re in the area, come for the fun and laughs and leave with inspiration for a better marriage.

June 27-28th, 2009.

Living free, quite frankly, is no fall cakewalk. Fear binds me all up – binds me to expectations, religion, and sure-fire failure. I can never measure up to other’s expectations, religion’s rules, or perfect pastor-wife’s position. But I‘ve found a secret to living free from all that.

It’s really a one step process: Take love and be filled to overflowing. As I’ve learned through difficulties, God is all I need, all I want, and nothing else can fill that place.

It’s love, true love that’s the key to living free and casting off cords that bind. My life verse is “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.”(2 Tim. 1:7) Out of love comes power and self-discipline; timidity and fear melt away. I pray this verse when fear strikes.

Perfect love comes from personal relationship with God. Freedom to live as a Christ follower doesn’t come from religion’s rules, but flows out of love for God. Ironically, this freedom requires more of a commitment. It’s about relationship with God and proper relational etiquette rather than rules of “churchianity.” A self-discipline. See previous verse. We have to mind all the checks the Holy Spirit gives. That’s way beyond a set of rules handed down from generations of church going people. The only way to receive the promptings and checks of God is to have personal dialogue with God – a personal relationship.

I offer a personal introduction to God as well as a set of communication exercises in iGETitLIFE with Purpose. The exercises are not set in stone. They are only coaching exercises to get your dialogue with God started on a personal level.

But first comes the introduction. We must realize we don’t measure up and see our need for God. That’s called sin. No matter how big or small, we all have it. But if you don’t feel the need for God, it won’t do any good to introduce you to him. If you desire an introduction, after realizing your need, you simply tell God you need him. “God, I’ve made a mess. I’ve sinned. I need you. Please come into my life, change my heart, and become my master giving me prompts and helping me follow them. God, I need you. Thank you for listening.”

If you talked with God like that and meant it with everything that’s in you, you are a Christ follower – one who is committed to following Jesus. At this point you have all the love you need to live free, but . . .

You have to live it out. It’s harder than living up to expectations and rules, but it’s freer. Fear will push you back into expectations and rules. Love will draw you deeper into the sacred relationship. Every moment is a choice, love or fear. One is freedom the other bondage.

Choose well, my friends. God’s grace will cover you in repentance.
 

I plopped face first in a pile of emotion. Near tears, but refused to succumb. What would the kids think? I felt overwhelmed, unworthy, and unable. Pick an area of life–any area. I was totally unfit to accomplish anything I was supposed to do in all areas of my life. I had so many good and necessary tasks to carry out and fulfill God’s calling on my life, but looming over me was a sense of utter inability and sure-fire failure. This feeling was all in my head . . . or was it?

I had the same twenty-four hours as others to accomplish the actions items that overloaded my table. What to do first? Do I have what it takes? What if I mess up? Living life was frightening. Dying seemed a respite of peace. But before dirt is thrown in my face, would anything I’ve done, said, or stood for be considered beautiful, jaw dropping, or worthy? I was called to share the encouragement of Christ, but there were so many steps, means, and ways to do it that confusion and frustration concerning my lack took over and I found myself in need of the encouragement I was to give. I wanted to hang it all, find a hole in the sand and stick my head in it. It was too many things to do, too many choices to make, and not enough of me to go around.

Since I was a leader, speaker, and writer, and my life an example (at least to my kids), I did what any powerless leader might do. I lay in an emotional heap, bare before God and open before his Word for the day’s reading. God spoke . . .

If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ (Oh yes. Lord, I have much encouragement from our relationship.), if any comfort from his love (Yes, your love and acceptance is great comfort in my inability and insecurity.), if any fellowship with the Spirit (How sweet is the fellowship with you, your Spirit, and your word! It is better than life, and makes life worth living.), if any tenderness and compassion (You are tender and compassionate with my frailties and shortcomings. I will be filled with the same for others.), 2 then make my joy complete (Thank you! Because of your work in and through me, you make me completely joyful.) by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose (In unity of mind, love, spirit, and purpose with you, I can be and do all you call me to do.). 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Yes Lord, I will not consider anything related to myself, rather relish in your love and acceptance and build others up.) (Phil. 2:1-4, NIV).

I learned five essentials to a successful life for overcoming mountains of insecurity, conquering heaps of responsibility, and fulfilling God’s purpose for my life.

Humility. Effective leaders are servants. Servants consider those they serve as more important than themselves. Leaders place their needs aside to serve the needs of others. Authentic leadership doesn’t seek to make a name for themselves, but to build up those they serve. Genuinely effective leaders are created in time spent with God.

Prayer. Effective leaders are in constant communion with God. They know their power to lead comes from God alone, and without prayer their leadership is less powerful, original, and creative. Prayer makes a good leader better.

Word. Effective leaders find guidance and direction in God’s Word. They know without the truth of scripture there is no hope, no point to work towards. Servant leaders search God’s word for direction and leadership for their own lives then translate what they learn to lead others.

Follow Through. Effective leaders lead. They follow through in all the ways in which God leads. That sounds elementary, but this is where the well intentioned remains only intentions. They don’t do it all perfectly. Authentic leaders are not only willing to lead, but honest enough to understand not everything they try will work. Good leaders are quick to evaluate, try a new tactic, and keep at the job in the face of failure. Thomas Edison said, "I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work." Follow through is key to success.

Assistance. Effective leaders look for ways to include others. They know their limitations and "staff" to their weaknesses. God provides helpers to complement our weaknesses. "Look to the hills from whence our help comes" (Psalms 121:1). Good leaders know the more they empower and include others to serve the more creative and effective are the outcomes.

My near tears of discouragement turned into joy and compassion. I gained a renewed purpose to continue working at the increasing load on my table knowing that it is God who called and he is able to finish what he started with me, his imperfect instrument (2 Tim 1:12). With God all things are possible (Matt. 19:26). "Pay attention to the ministry you have received in the Lord, so that you can accomplish it." (Col. 4:17, HCSB). I am eager to watch God move this mountain of responsibilities, inabilities, and frailties to make a splendid wonder out of my nothing. How great is our God!

previously posted on July 29, 2008 at www.VondaSkelton.com
"I’m so excited to introduce our guest blogger, my friend, author and speaker, Robin Bryce. Robin and I met years ago in Knoxville, TN, when we both attended a CLASServices seminar for speakers." Vonda Skelton

How could God ever use an ordinary person like me? Come on. I know who I am, what I think, and how I’ve behaved. All this baggage disqualifies any divine purpose or sacred use of my common life. Right? Why would God bother?

William Paul Young, author of The Shack, expressed those same sentiments in Atlanta at the Catalyst Conference ’08. His intentions for writing the parable was to explain his journey to God, healing, and wholeness to his children, to leave a legacy of faith for his kids. He had no intention of publishing it for the world or starting discussions amongst theologians, or stirring up dissention. (Actually—seeing this man in person—I felt he was quite humbled by God’s use of him, and not antagonistic while others maligned his character.)

But God . . .

When we yield to God, he takes our ordinary lives, our stuff, and can use it to make a difference, a change, in others lives. I’m not going to explore the theological rightness or wrongness of Paul Young’s parable, but the fact that God can and will use a common factory employee to tell about the grace, mercy, and love of God in a way that a God-seeker, believer and unbeliever alike, can relate. If God can use a common man’s parable to cause people to ask about Biblical truth, and read the Bible for truth, can’t he just as well use our stories and our lives?

The change agent, the difference maker, is our relationship with God. He takes ordinary mess and gives superb purpose.

Reminds me of another parable and journey told in The Dream Giver about a man named Ordinary. Both are stories I find true in my life as I seek God with all I have. The impossible becomes possible. The unthinkable becomes believable. The dream becomes reality.

If you’ve found God using your ordinary, I want to know about it. Others want to share in your excitement and joy you’ve found as God has taken your ordinary or mess and made a difference in the lives of those around you. Post a reply to this blog, or e-mail your story and a picture (if you wish) for inclusion in the iGETitLIFE e-Update newsletter of God doing great things amongst us. Sign up for the iGETitLIFE e-Update here on the right.
 

Eager to hear from you!

Robin