Tag Archive - ministry

Marriage Tops Secret Prayer List: Discover You’re Not Alone

After years of counseling women, I’ve noticed that nearly every one carries some kind of relationship burden.

Their prayer requests and private conversations are loaded with relationship issues. The dominant prayer topics are for their children or spouse.

Couple in Relationship Trouble

Marriage Hurts

The marital relationship is the most crucial one in the heart of women.

Recently, after coming home from an event, I was contacted by two women desperate for help in their marriages. Neither attended that day’s event and they lived over 175 miles away from each other. Yet their cry seemed universal.

“My marriage is the pits.” 

After encouraging these women, I had a bright idea.

In the past, I’d taken written prayer requests from women at church events. Why not dig them out of my files, sort them into categories and find the percentage breakdown? I found a correlation between their prayer and their relations.

Unofficial Research

Obviously, this is no official research such as Barna, but it is my findings concerning prayer for relationships.

Prayer Request Percentage

The percentage of prayer requests concerning marriage was much higher than any other type of prayer need recorded.

  • The marriage/spouse requests outpaced the rest at 45% of the group.
  • The requests for their children and step-children came in at 33% of the group.
  • The remaining 22% is a special case. I grouped them together. Many were for other families emphasizing trouble among its members. Odds are pretty high that many of these requests include hidden prayer for marriages.

Christians don’t often admit we’re having trouble with our kids and we surely don’t want others to know our marriage is horrible. We try to keep appearances of having it together, yet the divorce rate is just as high with believers as it is for non-believers.

A bad marriage makes us feel powerless and hopeless, like giving up. Yet, the reality is that we are much more vulnerable than helpless.

We have a 50% chance at minimum to make a bad marriage good, or a good one even better. We are half the answer. If we choose, we can work to change our relationship. And that’s not helpless. Vulnerable maybe, but not powerless.

We can Make a Difference

Change is hard. One way to make the relationship better is for us to change for the better. Here are some things we can do to initiate the desired change:

  • Check our attitude. (Momma was right on this one.)
  • Place a guard over our words.
  • Understand our own imperfections which allows us to offer grace to others in their weaknesses.
  • Trust God to love and keep us safe even if we can’t trust the person who hurt us.

Yes, we are quite vulnerable. But if we add complete faith in God, we are even more effective in changing.

God knows it all.

He already knows the circumstance you’re in and your thoughts about it. “Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight…” (Hb 4:13). In that case, we should want to discipline and clean our personal and spiritual lives.

Learning to pray conversationally is key to becoming spiritually fit.

Since God knows what we’re thinking, we can tattle to him about others. Venting with God slowly changes the way we think and act, because prayer changes us.

I wrote a training/mentoring book to teach others how to pray in this way. Come Awake has 21 days of exercises and takes the reader though the prayer process while reading the Gospel of John.

When we learn to pray and focus on God, obeying him in all things, our chances of change rises above 50%. In our obedience to God, we pray for the best things to come to the other person and we stop our selfish actions.

We need all the help we can get, because relationships are hard. They are heavy weights in our emotional wellbeing. The closer the relationship, the more weight it holds for possible joy and inevitable pain. I love the line from the movie, The Help. “Love and hate are two horns on the same goat…” And we have to have goats, those close relationships.

Please share what help you have to offer. What are your most pressing prayer requests? How could you change to create better relationships?

Here is a post to help women in make their marriage better: 3 Steps to a New Husband.

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*Picture by David Castillo Dominici/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

On Productivity: Part II – 6 Tips to Get More Done System

Lori approached my problem like she would help a small business owner. For over an hour, she listened to my vision, heard what I was doing and evaluated the stress factors in how I was operating. Afterward, she quickly analyzed and strategized the beginnings of a system for which I was to start.

Check List

As discussed in On Productivity Part I — 101 Reasons to Get Nothing Done, I kept ending my work days with empty hands. If I was my boss, I’d fire me. Then I called Lori, a friend and qualified help.

To begin working the system she cast for me I had to change my thinking on some things as well as set up an organized catch-all. She left me greatly encouraged since it will work with my creative (distracted) personality. Here is a short list of some items I am to do:

  1. Set Office/Work Hours.
    Sounds extraordinarily simple. But when you work out of your home, it’s not as easy as one might think. The tyranny of the urgent is always ringing, beeping, or crying somewhere in the house. It’s lots easier to go to work in an office where a boss wants to see your body in your chair. Even though I don’t clock in somewhere, I have work to do. I must begin to treat my work time as just that–time for work. I can’t just stop work for everyone. I must say, “No. My office hours are 9 to 2 and I can’t meet you until afterwards.”
  2. Keep track of Time.
    Oh, logging time sounds easy enough until you try it. It feels like punching a card. A discipline that’s seems to threaten my freedom to creatively drift from project to project. Obviously it’s not that strict, but practically logging the time I work on the different projects is, well, a discipline for me. The end result is awesome though. I’ll know for certain the average time it takes to write a blog post, a print article and the first draft of a book. I’d be able to give a realistic answer instead of a creative, made-up number of hours. Oh, and I’d get a great sense of accomplishment in seeing the small tasks completed that contribute to my long term goals. A big win!
  3. Set up auto email rules.
    I’ve heard this before, but never saw the value until now. I re-read and open the same email multiple times on two different devices, my iPhone and my Mac. To cut down on email decisions and actions I set up rules on my MAC (In Apple Mail, create mailboxes on your MAC, then go to Mail Preferences and create rules to directly send mail to those boxes.) I have blog emails and other things I want to read automatically sent to my reading box (I typically read these on my iPhone while waiting in Wal-mart lines.) I created another rule for spammy and salesy stuff. Once a day I go to those boxes and delete them all. And my email inbox stays manageable. Yippee!!
  4. Do bookkeeping once a week.
    Yuk, books and finances. Not my favorite thing. On a set day each week, Lori STRONGLY stressed my need to check online bank accounts and log transactions in my Quickbooks. Sounds better than once a year just before tax season. Think of the stress I’ll save myself. (Haven’t yet figured out how to put revolving tasks on my Franklin Covey style To-Do list. I could set an alarm on my calendar for the weekly and monthly tasks. Any other suggestions here?)
  5. Create a Binder.
    This is my catch-all, my brain-so-I-can-stop-thinking, the place-to-find-every-important-thing binder. The binder will free my mind from having to remember so much stuff. Any information that needs quick recall will be at the flip of my fingers. It will grow to hold long term projects and log time sheets, links to useful online tools and blog post resources, login info, lists of social networks and bio update lists, website change-log, speaker bureaus, bookkeeping spreadsheets, etc. Whatever information I could possibly need for this business of ministry is to be in this Binder for easy retrieval. No more searching. I suddenly feel like this binder will be my life between plastic-coated cardboard!
  6. Use small notebook.
    I’ve been keeping a to-do list in a spiral notebook and using Franklin Covey’s system of prioritizing with A, B, C and 1, 2, 3, but now I’m adding a new element. I will still date each day, but not forward each task. That was cumbersome. (Since I wasn’t getting much done, I’d have to recopy much of the list!) This time I’ll include bold check-mark boxes in front of each item to delineate when one task starts and the other ends. Long term projects are moved to my “life” binder and broken into small tasks which will be added to this to-do list as they become the Work-on-now tasks. I’ll eat that elephant one bite at a time. I’ll note the time it takes to complete the tasks on this list then transfer to Binder log sheets once a week. During this once a week updating process, I’ll go back and evaluate the tasks not completed. If still important, I’ll highlight them in order to make sure they get done. Or scratch them off.

Sounds simple, huh? For you maybe, but for me it’s a major shift and discipline set. I can see how I could actually be more productive. I’ve gained hope. And sometimes hope accompanied by the belief and accountability of a good friend can be all the motivation we need to make drastic changes.

What methods of getting things done do you use? Where is your weakness and biggest need for change? Who can you ask for help?

Part I: 101 Reasons to Get Nothing Done

This post is part of the blog series Insights into Ministry and Leadership. Interested in guest posting, check out the guidelines.

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*Picture by David Castillo Dominici/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

On Productivity: Part I – 101 Reasons to Get Nothing Done

Getting in the groove, especially after a break, is difficult. I seem to burn a day without much to show at the end of it. I get off the hamster wheel to grab a bite to eat or meet someone, but, over all, my nose is put to the tasks with little or no effect. I need to be more productive with my time.

My time and effort gets me nothing. Nothing, but 101 reasons why I can’t get things done. My desk might be one reason.

Desk

It’s a mess. I know. My workspace usually looks worse. So bad that I often take the MAC Air and head to clearer places.

My computer files are more messed up than the desk.

And please, don’t even look at my email inbox.

But the most cluttered part is my mind. It’s exponentially worse off than both my space and schedule combined.

The outcome is lots of stress and no progress. My productivity has been ZERO for too long. If I was my boss, I’d fire me.

The reality is that the creative part of me generates more ideas (tasks) than the practical homeschooling mom, household manager, and minister’s wife could possibly get done. I still have to perform the regular duties of cooking, cleaning, gardening, teaching, mentoring, leading, speaking and just being a wife and a friend. Add on the creative part of ministry and the business of it and I’m done.

Tired.

Sick and tired of not getting things done. By itself, my Franklin Covey way of prioritizing tasks in my little notebook wasn’t working anymore. Where is that saw that needs sharpened anyway? I need some drastic help.

Therefore, I looked into what other productive people do to get things done. After trying several systems, Michael Hyatt applauds David Allen, author of Getting Things Done and Nozbe, a task management system based upon the book’s principles. I researched the program and it sounds awesome. Check out Mr. Allen’s desk. But I can’t afford Nozbe’s monthly fee to get my life together.

GTDdesk*picture gettingthingsdone.com

Overwhelmed and lusting after productivity, I ended up doing what every overworked preacher’s wife does.

I whined.

Got slightly depressed.

And conducted an intense search of the house for dark chocolate!

Afterward, I called a friend for help.

Lori is a smart business woman who coaches small business owners to be more productive. (Surely she could help.) After sitting down with me for an hour and listening to my whine and never ending to-do lists, she quickly concluded how I should handle my tasks. (Btw, she didn’t see my desk or she’d have given up before starting.)

Stay tuned for the next post where I’ll share, to the best of my understanding, the system Lori said would help me. Her system might work for you too.

How do you deal with your weaknesses? What does your workspace look like? What excuses do you have for not getting things done?

Part II: 6 Tips to Get More Done System

This post is part of the blog series Insights into Ministry and Leadership. Interested in guest posting, check out the guidelines.

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Beauty: a Requisite for a Minister’s Wife?

Should a minister’s wife be beautiful? From a Google Internet search not too long ago, this question landed here on Confessions of a Preacher’s Wife. When I read it, I chuckled and figured I wouldn’t make it if that were a requirement. After a laugh, I began to empathize with the one asking the question.

Should a Minister's Wife be

Was it a man knowing he would eventually fill the role of a minister? Or a woman about to become a minister’s wife? Could it have been a woman already performing as a minister’s wife who feels pressure to be what she thinks she isn’t? Sadly, this is common because someone somewhere didn’t value her and may have told her she was less than desirable. These wounds cut to the core of a woman no matter its source.

Source of Beauty

Without knowing the source of the question, I’ll attempt to answer it by starting with the origin of a woman’s beauty. Since God created woman, he’s the designer of her beauty. Each and every characteristic as well as her God given image displays his handiwork. It is her natural beauty. But when God redeems a woman, his beauty comes to reside in her. When she intently follows him, God gives her a supernatural beauty that shines similar to Moses’ veiled face (Ex. 34:30). A woman living in obedience to God becomes uncommonly desirable with an unexplainable glow. The source of original beauty is God.

God backs up these views about beauty in the scripture. “Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised” (Pr 31:30). In another reference, those who carry the Good News in obvious obedience to God have beautiful feet (Rm 10:15).

Common Looks Becomingly

With obedience to God, a common woman becomes uncommonly beautiful. The French have a word for this phenomenon. Belle laide means “a beautiful ugly woman, a woman who is attractive though not conventionally beautiful.”[1]

So “Should a minister’s wife be beautiful?” Well I believe, in light of God’s supernatural work, the answer is an absolute yes. Should the trappings of our culture’s view of beauty and a woman’s value be weighed in the decision? No.

Thinking Deeper

But I don’t think the questioner wanted a simple yes or no answer. They may have wanted some thoughts to ponder or even actions to take. So, if you’re looking for a few suggestions, here are some to consider:

  • Single men – Seek a woman who is so in love with Jesus that you feel like a third wheel.
  • Married men – Lead the family and serve them while showing them how to obey and serve God. Treat your wife like a beautiful queen. Most will respond by behaving more beautifully.
  • And for women whether single, married or married to a minister, I suggest you keep practicing the regular beauty treatments, with moderation. Yet give your all in seeking after the perfect lover, Jesus, who will make you remarkably beautiful.

Give it a shot and let me know what you think. Let me know how others respond differently to you when you practice these “beauty” treatments.

If you have a topic or suggestion you would like to discuss please contact me here make a comment on this post!

This post is part of the blog series Minister Wives Fellowship and Support. Check out the others.

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[1] Merriam-Webster, I. (2003). Merriam-Webster’s collegiate dictionary. (Eleventh ed.). Springfield, Mass.: Merriam-Webster, Inc.

How to End Well by Focusing on the Beginning

When things approach the end, a sort of excitement and even dread builds. I laughed at my friend’s reaction to the thought of her husband retiring. She felt anticipation, excitement and gloom. For her, it was like a sentence was given and the time was yet to be served. She started a countdown 20 months before R-Day. Over a year away and she’s still counting, excited, happy and filled with anticipation, as well as some anxious, dread of the inevitable.

The End is Coming

The End is Coming!

People like me feel the urgency to make the most of the last few days, squeezing in the results we desired. Time doesn’t stop for our work. The gong of the clock grades our life and our stewardship. Staying focused on the goals we set at the beginning will help us finish well.

Endings cause goal-oriented people to experience a weird rush of relief, worry and wonder if their efforts made a difference. We evaluate our work against the goals. We question: Did we accomplish what we set out to do? Did we manage resources well? Did we use time wisely? Could we have done things better?

Fresh Start

New Beginnings and Fresh Starts

The cool thing about endings is that they are the hope of new, fresh starts. The new year brings another block of time. A new contract or job comes with a treasure of resources and a multitude of opportunities. A new beginning gives us a second chance to do right and to live wisely.

I seem to regularly need a do-over or a re-start. In the past, I’ve fallen prey to multitasking: doing lots of things at one time and none of them very well (See previous post Why Multitasking Reduces Productivity). My trying to get things done simultaneously produced lots of ho hum results, if any at all. I started projects and finished none. Not at all how I planned to end.

My hope and prayer is to be more productive. I plan to slow down, focus on one thing at a time and do my best work on it. I’m going to stop multitasking. If I’m able to succeed at that goal, I might stop burning dinner, hear my kids, and actually know where I’m going when in the driver’s seat. Hopefully, I’ll finish the projects I started last year.

Now, may focus take over my multitasking ways!

How about you? Did you end your last project as you wanted? Met your goals? Declared failure and did a re-start? Declared bankruptcy and quit? Please share how you focus and finish well?

This post is part of the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series.

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*pictures from keepingitsassy.wordpress.com & whosright.com

Last Orphanage Walk

This morning was filled with mixed emotions. I was ready to get back to see my kids, but I wasn’t quite ready to leave these orphans. I said, “If I could, I’d bring them home with me.” The final packing was very somber. Jacque and I finished before the others were ready and asked if we could walk over to the kid’s house to see them one last time.

Last visit to the Orphanage

We walked like it was our last stride taking in every small thing. Here’s the African cows we passed everyday on our walk:

African Cow

African Cow

We wanted to take it slow, but also wanted to get to the kids quickly. The kids hollered with excitement when we rounded the corner and they saw us. I wanted to cry, but held it together. The kids were delighted to see us.

Carolyn, the orphan choir mistress (leader) and I

Carolyn, the orphan choir mistress (leader) and I

Orphans Saying Goodbye

Orphans Saying Goodbye

The older ones wanted to hug us their goodbyes. Some holding on to us with their eyes. It was difficult to smile. The younger ones had a quick greeting then disappeared to the far corner of the compound to play. As I visited with the older ones, I watched the younger ones building a fort-like tent our of a torn mosquito net, old plastic bags and trash. They tied the net to the corner of the fence at the same level to make a triangle roof to crawl under, Then they put trash on top to block the sun and laid plastic sacks underneath to cover the dirt. They were very busy building.

Homemade Shade Going Away Gift

Homemade Shade Going Away Gift

Later, I felt a tug on my hand. A little girl had come to get me. She didn’t speak English so I had to read her intentions. I’m sort of slow at that and it took her pulling my hand several times for me to get it. She led me to the sitting spot under the homemade shade. The thought crossed my mind, that they were honoring me, the oldest mama, by giving me a special seat that they created. After a minute or two, another went to bring Jacque too.

Orphans Worship as our Parting Gift

About the time we settled in, the vans came to get us. We gathered around the mango tree to share our goodbyes and tears and to sing a praise song once more before we left. This is the first song they taught us and it stuck. Here’s a video of them singing:

We took off toward Entebbe and stopped in Jenga for lunch and picking up a few souvenirs along the way. We were not making good time and drove into the night into Entebbe. It was our first real outing at night in Uganda because it wasn’t the safest for us to be out at night.

We made it through security, faking Chuck’s health all along the way. The team rested in the Entebbe airport for a couple of hours then started the loooong flight home, 22 hours and layovers. Not fun. Since we boarded at 11:30 p.m. I slept the first flight into Amsterdam. During the 4 hour layover in Amsterdam, Chuck laid down in a McDonald’s restaurant area and the team debriefed a little. I found a Starbucks and had my first taste of home, a no foam latte, and a chocolate croissant for breakfast.

On board again. Chuck was taking high potency pain killers along with the antibiotics like clock work. He also numbed the pain by watching back-to-back movies. We finally landed in Texas Thursday afternoon and called the doctor right away. We went to his office and he put Chuck in the hospital. We were so glad to be hospitalized IN Texas.

While Chuck was getting the treatment he needed, I spoke at a women’s prayer breakfast Saturday morning and Sunday morning our Uganda Mission Team (minus Chuck) gave a testimony about Uganda in both our church services. He was released Monday afternoon with plans for surgery later, when the infection was clear.

Orphan Adoption and Sponsorship

Mike and Jacque are looking into the adoption process to give Fiona a physical home since she already has an emotional one in their hearts. You can read more about their story here and on their Bring Fiona Home website. You can also sponsor an orphan, write to them and read letters from them. If interested, check out Elpis Ministries.

Fiona!

Fiona!

More pictures are uploaded on Facebook. Check them out.

Please pray for the mission. You can sign up to be a partner in prayer. And for updates while on location you can subscribe to feed here.

Please comment below. I’d love to hear any insight you have about our choice of choosing to come back to Texas before seeking healthcare, your experience of leaving those you’ve grown to love in ministry, or possibly how God may have moved you to adopt an orphan. Please share your comments below.

This post is part of the Living and Working on Mission Blog Series and you can read more about our trip in the previous Uganda posts. If you enjoyed it you may also like the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series, the Spiritual Journey’s Gentle Nudges Series or the other Blog Series.

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Riding Around Africa

I slept very comfortably in a grass hut. During the night, if we had to use the toilet we walked outside to another hut with a concreted porta-potty kind of thing. It had a toilet seat concreted into a raised sitting spot that went straight into an underground tank. Comfy-at-night feeling.

Waterfall at Sipi Falls

Waterfall at Sipi Falls

Chuck didn’t sleep very well. The altitude sickness from the evening before wasn’t letting up. He was looking forward to getting back down the mountain this morning to see if he got better. Iganga’s elevation where the orphanage is based is about 3600 ft above sea level and Sipi Falls Lodge about 6700 ft in the foothills of Mt. Elgon in eastern Uganda, almost to Kenya. That’s nothing compared to 40,000 ft for about 22 hours flying there (link to flight post).

Early, James knocked to see if we wanted to hike up to the falls. I wanted to, but Chuck was feeling pretty bad so I stayed with him. James, Jacque and Mike took off to climb the slippery, red-mud slopes. It took them about two hours to make the hike to the second waterfall taking pictures and sliding most of the way.

After they left, I went to take a shower which was located in a separate grass hut. It was exquisite in decor. The shower head dripped over flat and smooth rocks where my feet went. The drain was hidden under the rocks. The hot water was non-existent. Well, there was occasional flash of warmer water, but it mostly felt ice cold like the water from the Sipi River. Since the weather was cold 50-60ish and rainy, I was VERY reluctant to jump in the shower. No hair washing today!

After re-packing my backpack, I walked up the hill to the main lodge for coffee and breakfast. I needed some warmth. Sipi Falls Lodge was like a royalty treatment in grass huts. The food was delicious and served with special yummy-ness. The total cost of this romantic getaway was about $60 a night per person and that included three meals.

Riding Around Africa

We loaded into the van for the ride home. The beauty of the valley below with the clouds wisping through was awesome. I was totally struck with the thought, “Hey, I’m riding around Africa!”

Driving the mountain

Driving the mountain

On the road, we came to a police check point. The police have stations where they stand on the side of the road stopping traffic whenever they have a whim. They wear camo, carry their AK-47′s, look over the van and ask questions like: Where are you going? Where have you been? What are you going to do? This time they made a request for us to give them a book. Cameron gave him his Bible, then he let us pass. I was pretty scared sitting in the back of the van watching another policeman watching the van. I found out after we were allowed to pass that Jacque was fearful too. (Sorry, no pictures were allowed of police. I didn’t want to get arrested!)

On down the road, Chuck saw monkeys in the forest trees. Jacque and I stuck our heads out the window to look for some. When we didn’t see them right away, we started making monkey sounds hollering into the trees as we whizzed by in the van. At that speed, who knows if I saw one or not. Maybe I did.

Celebration with the Orphans

With only a four hour trip home, we pulled into the missionary house to get ready for the party that night. We took streamers, animal crackers, cake mix and party balloons to have a party for the kids. A regular feast was fixed with rice, beans, chicken, beef, fish, cabbage, peppers, onions, ground innards (a pretty tasty paste made up of …, guess), and soda pop.

Party Streamers with the Orphans

Party Streamers with the Orphans

Chuck took a turn for the worse by the time we got him into bed. Fever spiked and decisions had to be made about doctor, clinic, or go buy some more of the same antibiotics he had already finished the day before. We opted to buy more medicine which anyone can buy without prescriptions in Uganda. We were to fly out the next day and it was already late into the night. He laid in bed while the kids prayed for him in the courtyard. They sang their prayer. Although I fretted about Chuck, their song was beautiful. Chuck dozed and the party began.

We ate played and visited with the kids. We witnessed the whole lot of orphans getting in trouble by Susan. The amount of respect she warrants isn’t to be trifled with. They mind. This might be the reason they are so respectful with us. It’s easy to see the love they have for Susan and her love for them. The party was a hit even though there were obstacles. We had a blast, but in our thoughts was the fact that this was the last night to see the kids.

Before bed we packed part of our bags for the trip home. Click to see more pictures on FaceBook.

Please pray for the mission. You can sign up to be a partner in prayer. And for updates while on location you can subscribe to feed here.

Please contribute your comment below. I’d love to hear your guess about ground innards, your understanding about discipline and respect, or your idea about resorting Uganda being more like camping America. Go ahead and comment.

This post is part of the Living and Working on Mission Blog Series and you can read more about our trip in the previous Uganda posts. If you enjoyed it you may also like the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series, the Spiritual Journey’s Gentle Nudges Series or the other Blog Series.

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Travel to Romantic Sipi Falls for Rest

This morning we went had a good breakfast and went to the orphanage to finish setting up the solar lights and water filter (no more boiling their drinking water). We rode in the back of Phil’s truck, standing up holding onto the rack. Which is common. We saw many Uganda buses, flatbed trucks with rails where people stand and hold on. Every time we walked to the orphanage, we gathered stares from the people on the streets, but riding in the truck like this made us feel like we were in a real parade. “Watch the mzungus” (white people). We smiled and waved back to the people as we rode by. One must wave like a parade queen in Uganda anyway. The folding-fingers-over-palm wave is their way of calling their children to come to them. (Phil used this kind of wave to call me from the van to the porch to meet some school officials.)

Water Filter Barrel in Orphanage

Water Filter Barrel in Orphanage

After the few chores were finished at the kids house, we loaded back into the truck and went back to the missionary house. Everything was ready for our trip of rest. We reloaded into the van with an overnight bag and water bottles to go to Sipi Falls for a much needed rest. We really wanted to stay with the kids, but this scheduled respite was needed. We stopped to pick up Susan, her mother and baby Kaith then got on our way.

The drive was to be four hours in the direction of Kenya. That’s a long trip considering that every village uses huge speed bumps to slow traffic. That’s on top of the pot holes that take up most of the road. Phil said the roads will be fixed and reworked when an election is upcoming. I guess, politicians in every country want votes and do things to get them.

We rode in a new-to-the-ministry van that had “new” seats which were very comfortable. The drive took much longer because the van kept getting overheated. We stopped often to pour our water bottles into the radiator. Once we began to run out we had help form the locals who fetched the water from a river or somewhere that had dirty reddish water. The ground in Uganda is red and the water has a red tint. The dirt is sort of like the red clay stuff on the baseball diamond. Turns out the van was fresh from Tokyo and had some strange blanket over the radiator making it heat up.

Ocean of African Plains

African Dog Overlooking Ocean of African Plains

African Dog Overlooking Ocean of African Plains

As we approached Sipi Falls, mountains rose out of the plain. These mountains are not quite like any I’ve seen in America. They were beautiful like ours but different. Cows grazed and farmers walked the steep hillside working crops in places similar to the ones the goats and sheep bound from in Yellowstone. Once we were in the mountains and looked back, it seemed like an ocean of African plains laid below as far as the eye could see.

Uganda Orphan Mission Team at Sipi Falls

Uganda Orphan Mission Team at Sipi Falls

Uganda Orphan Mission Team at Sipi Falls

Eight hours or so later, our van finally made it to our overnight place. We pulled in and had a European lunch that should have been served at 1 but we were arriving at 5. That’s Uganda time again. One never knows what will happen or when. We ate “lunch” then hiked a short trail to a handmade cave under the first water fall. It had rained and the red dirt was mud. Sipi Falls was more like Slippery Falls.

European Elegant Dining at Sipi Falls

European Elegant Dining at Sipi Falls

Once we started out on the trail about 6 youths joined us to hold our hands and be tour guides. I had one on each hand to keep me from slipping. They were barefoot and kept solid footing the whole time. I might as well been in ice skates and I don’t skate! We slid back for dinner by 7:30. We dined in elegance in an African hut rustic meets Europe kind of place. European foods (A creamy fish soup to start off served with big crusty rolls and jam, followed by curried chicken and rice with steamed veggies, then brownies which were more of an unsweetened, bitter chocolate version, and African Tea. Chuck got altitude sickness and missed the meal.

 Grass Hut Experience

Grass Hut at Sipi Falls

Grass Hut at Sipi Falls

Inside Grass Hut at Sipi Falls

Inside Grass Hut at Sipi Falls

Grass Hut Keeping us Dry

Grass Hut Keeping us Dry

After dinner, I went with Chuck to our grass-roofed hut for the night leaving the team visiting with their African coffee and tea. It was raining and dark out, but we were amazingly dry in our grass hut. Once again, it was so elegant and quaint. The grass on the roof was at least 12 inches thick and the edge of the roof showed only the first inch wet. The bed and night stands were rocked into the hut with a foam mattress to rest on. The bathrooms were in a separate grass hut and the showers were in another.

Chuck and I at Sipi Falls

Chuck and I at Sipi Falls

Sipi Falls is a very romantic kind of place. We slept with the roar of the waterfall lulling us to sleep. Through our opened door, the morning light held a splendid view of the falls with beautiful foliage surrounding.

More pictures are uploaded on Facebook. Check them out.

Please pray for the mission. You can sign up to be a partner in prayer. And for updates while on location you can subscribe to feed here.

Please comment below. I’d love to hear any questions you might have about mission work in Uganda.

This post is part of the Living and Working on Mission Blog Series and you can read more about our trip in the previous Uganda posts. If you enjoyed it you may also like the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series, the Spiritual Journey’s Gentle Nudges Series or the otherBlog Series.

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Sunday Worship, Dinner and Gifts

Sunday we got up and had lazy morning and breakfast. Uganda time ruled. We rode in the van to church and Chuck was prepared to preach because he was told the night before that they would ask him. The church was held in Grace School where the orphans attend.

Worship

(YouTube of kids singing at Burial)

When we drove up we could hear the singing and clapping with the drum. Their voices carried. I was excited to see them again. The church was a homemade brick building with plaster. It was painted and had smooth concrete floor. Openings were in the walls for windows, but there was nothing covering the holes. There was one doorway without a door. Homemade school benches were arranged on one end like pews. They had a plank for a seat and another for a desk and would sit 3 adults comfortably. The orphans put on their best clothes for church. Africans like to dress up and they are the cleanest of people.

There were several choirs, one of younger children, another of older children and then one a little older. The church has a program director that was a woman. She introduced us to the pastor and congregation using Kenneth as an interpreter. A lady stood and asked for prayer and healing for her baby. The four to six week old boy had accidentally had boiling hot water dropped on his foot. This boiling water was extreme because they cook on open flame which makes boiling water bubble over.  During one of the songs the mother came and laid the baby in my arms. The skin and some of the flesh was gone on the top of his foot. Some whitish cream was applied to his raw foot. I managed to hold my breakfast by focusing on the baby’s pleasant face.  He sucked his fingers and didn’t make a fuss. His big brown eyes were clear and he looked healthy and content except for his foot. I rocked the precious little one to sleep and felt honored to hold the baby. (Sorry I don’t have a picture of this precious one. He was the son of the local pastor.)

It seems that everywhere I go someone is handing me a baby. I’ve held more babies in Uganda than I have in years. See baby here. The women in Uganda are proud of their babies and sharing them must be their way of showing them off. I guess they give them to me since I’m older than Jacque. I’m not really one who takes up babies every time I see them, but in Africa I became that person.

Kenneth, Our Guide and Protector

Kenneth, Our Guide and Protector, eating American Pop-Tarts

The lady program director asked us to stand and introduce ourselves. We spoke with Kenneth interpreting. They church applauded that I travel to different churches speaking and encouraging women to love Jesus with all their heart. As predicted Chuck preached with Kenneth interpreting and then we visited shortly with the members before leaving. Phil pulled Fiona out of the crowd of orphans and gave her to Jacque with, “This one is with us.” Fiona loaded into the van with us and we left. We stopped to pick up Susan along the way to Mum, the resort hotel for lunch.

Dinner at Mums in Iganga

We drove through a gate and to the left, under a grass roofed cabana was a pool table with a guard standing near. The men in our team quickly noticed the AK-47 lying on the pool table. We drove on in and parked. The hotel attendant, servant met us and escorted us to a table under a carport and another brought out menus. Phil and Susan said the Shallow fried Tilapia was yummy. It was served whole, head and all, with stewed tomatoes, peppers and onions on top. I’ve never had a better piece of fish, even with the eyeballs looking at me. (Susan ate the eyes.)

It was a joy to see Fiona drinking cold orange Fanta, making a face with each sip, and eating chicken and chips, which are french fries. Apparently cold food and drink is strange to Fiona. She doesn’t get cold stuff. The orphans eat posho and beans or porridge that is made with the same posho corn flour. Fiona put the food away.

After a wonderful dinner, we visited. Some talked about sleeping on the van rode home, others talked about dessert. Phil stopped the van on the way and Susan hopped out. She went in to the store and came back with Ugandan ice cream for every one. It was very good, sort of like melorine, the ice cream I had at my grandmother’s when I was growing up. You should have seen Fiona’s face as she tried it. She like the taste but not the cold. After eating all that food Fiona’s belly was pouching.

Fiona with Jacque and Mike

Fiona with Jacque and Mike

We arrived back at the missionary house full. Some wanted to take a nap, others wanted to finish setting up the solor lights in the orphans rooms and others went shopping to buy new soccer balls for the kids. Jacque sat on the front porch with Fiona sleeping in her lap. I sat with her working on these blog posts and visiting with her.

African Gifts and Dress

Later Susan arrived and started cooking a Ugandan pasta with beef bits and veggies. Yummy. Before dinner was ready she took Jacque and I to the back room and tied a scarf over our eyes. Then she dressed us and turned out the lights and called the men. The men came in and when she turned on the lights Jacque and I heard all kinds of ooo’s ahd ahh’s. Susan had dressed us in the traditional African dresses with poofy sleeves. She unblindfolded us and we got to see each other. Her’s was pretty pink and mine was wonderful blue. Absolutely gorgeous dresses.

Gifted Dresses

Gifted Dresses

While Susan had us blindfolded the kids came into the back courtyard for the rest of the movie. After the guys gave us their opinion, Jacque and I walked out back to show the kids our new threads and they all loved it. They clapped and laughed heartily. They love it when we try learning their native, tribal language and now we were wearing their cultural clothes. They loved it.

Robin hugging little orphan girl

Holding little orphan girl

These children are so happy. They love to laugh and genuinely love to see us. If you ever get depressed you should come to Uganda. These pretty smiles will cheer you up. My face hurts from smiling back.

More pictures are uploaded on Facebook. Check them out.

Please pray for the mission. You can sign up to be a partner in prayer. And for updates while on location you can subscribe to feed here.

Please comment below. I’d love to hear any questions you might have about mission work in Uganda.

This post is part of the Living and Working on Mission Blog Series and you can read more about our trip in the previous Uganda posts. If you enjoyed it you may also like the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series, the Spiritual Journey’s Gentle Nudges Series or the otherBlog Series.

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Uganda Caning on the Blindside

After a late night of using the currently-working sporadic internet, we arose early. I was excited about going back to the kids house to visit with them. These kids are absolutely adorable. They are so loving, kind and happy! In spite of the circumstances in which they live, they are so happy. It’s amazing! Who wouldn’t want to be around such delightful people?

Happy Orphans

Happy Orphans

Happy Orphans

Before I went, I had African coffee, amazing scrambled eggs with tiny diced veggies, yellow colored “raisen” or fruit bread, fresh pineapple and fresh squeezed passion fruit juice. Phil told me this juice was sqeezed by hand and forced through a strainer by the ladies Susan hired to cook for us. I passed through the kitchen and seen one pushing something through a mesh wire, but had no clue what was going on. Their ways of cooking are very simple. Everything is killed, cut, squeezed and cooked fresh. Can you say yum! I wish I could serve you this awesome African tea.

After breakfast Jacque was antsy to go see Fiona, and to take Mariko to the orphanage. We played a little soccer in the missionary house yard, then left to the kids house. Mike and Kenny went with us while the rest of the team worked at the missionary house. We said goodbye to Mariko from the kids house. She had to get back to work in Kampala.

Caning on the Farm

We stayed a hour or two longer. until Phil and the rest of the team came to get us in the van and take us to the farm. The kids had planted maize and potatoes on their farm, spending days clearing the land and planting it by hand only to have the termites eat up all the maize. There wasn’t enough money to pay for pesticides to keep the termites away. The termite mounds were huge and taller than me.

Susan Caning Mike on the Farm

Susan Caning Mike on the Farm

As we walked the property line, Mike volunteered to have Susan cane him like she does when disciplining the children. She tapped him at first and Mike said, “Do it like you normally do.” “Caning” is done with a stick or cane about 3/4′s to one inch in diameter and it’s used to whop the tail end of the disobedient while they lay on the ground. Susan obliged and whacked Mike good. It stung him well and frightened me good. I wouldn’t cross Susan for nothing!

After everyone laughed quite nervously at Mike’s reaction to his stinging back side, we picked bananas, dug sweet potatoes and cleaned up Susan’s grandmother’s grave (it was her grandmother’s land given to use for the orphans). We carried the produce back to the van and the family at the nearby house fed us lunch. Susan had given them the goods to cook for us. We were escorted into the house where benches lined the walls. We sat and the family brought water for us to wash our hands and placed food on other benches in front of us. Then they left the room for us to eat together without them.

Dining on the Farm
Dining on the Farm

 

Honoring Mama

I finished eating before the others and sat visiting with them when a woman brought me a baby to hold. I think it must be customary for the oldest female visitor to be given the youngest baby to oo and ah over. It’s sort of funny that I’d be given the baby. I’m not typically one to take up babies when I see them, and Jacque, on the other hand, wanted to hold them.

Honored by Holding Baby

Honored by Holding Baby

After lunch we were taken outside to lay on grass mats under the trees. While many of the team napped, I watched the women noticing my hair. I pulled the pony tail down and let them touch my mzungu (I bought a t-shirt that had muzungu spelled mzungu) hair. It was so pleasant outside. I asked Susan if anyone ever slept out under the stars at night. (Remember there isn’t any air-conditioning in the houses). She said, “Never.” When pressed she said it is very dangerous to be outside at night. Thieves, drunkards and murderers and such will hurt you. I noticed that even though we were on Susan’s family’s land she locked the doors of the vans. Nothing is safe, even with family.

After a while we drove back to the missionary house, part of the team worked on beds and stuff at the house and the rest of us walked to the kid’s house to set up more solar lights. After being at the orphanage for a while, darkness was closing in and we needed to leave. The lights weren’t finished and I had a terrible time getting the guys to quit work to get back home. Once we left. I felt terribly unsafe, remembering what Susan told me. The bars were already playing music and lit up with flashing lights. I was very nervous. When we got back I thought Susan was going to cane all of us.

Fear, Tired and Blindside

As a group of people on mission get tired, the opportunity for disgruntled attitudes and behavior increases. Our team was nearing weariness. All of us, although testy, gave grace in all situations and didn’t give in to selfish type of reactions. Personally, I was on the brink of blowing and needed a break. What better break than a movie.

The power went out again. James and I came up with the idea of telling stories using a narrator (Chuck), and child actors behind a sheet with flashlights to make silhouettes. We told of David and Goliath, and the story of Job. The kids laughed, but not near as loud as they clapped when the power came back on.

*****
A ruckus took place at the gate of the mission house. Someone was lurking and peeping which in this culture is usually done by thieves and such. Moses, Susan, Phil and other local leaders took the man and called the police. Our team knew something was going on, but were told to keep working with the kids and act like nothing was wrong. After the night was over, Phil told us the gravity of the situation. This is why we weren’t supposed to tell people in the community where we were staying or who we were with. I felt like Lot’s visitor in Sodom and Gomorra.
*****

We settled into the private back courtyard for the viewing. I don’t know who chose the movie. I watching the kids watch “The Blindside” with Sandra Bullock. Try watching that movie with a bunch of dark, skinned African orphans. It sure changes the perspective, especially since before Big Mike moved in with Sandra, he had so much more than the orphans here have. I watched the kids laugh at the short mzungu little brother. They were enjoying the movie. Due to time, Phil stopped the movie in the middle of it and planned on finishing it the next night.

A side note to the evening, another 10 or 12 year old orphan girl took Fiona and kept her occupied away from Jacque the whole night. Later we talked with Phil about it and he said he’d talk with the girl to make sure jealousy wasn’t creeping in. These kids were creeping into our hearts and we wouldn’t want jealousy to have any room.

More pictures are uploaded on Facebook. Check them out.

Please pray for the mission. You can sign up to be a partner in prayer. And for updates while on location you can subscribe to feed here.

Please comment below. I’d love to hear how you deal with the challenges that come your way when you are tired and things aren’t going the way you desire. Would the fear of caning keep you doing right?

This post is part of the Living and Working on Mission Blog Series and you can read more about our trip in the previous Uganda posts. If you enjoyed it you may also like the Insights into Ministry & Leadership Series, the Spiritual Journey’s Gentle Nudges Series or the otherBlog Series.

Was this post helpful? Consider subscribing!
Check out the options for subscribing here! That way you won’t miss a post. And if you really think it’s tops, Twitter it and like the FaceBook page!

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