A Better Marriage with One Simple Change: The Art of Viewpoint

Guest post by minister’s wife, Lori Bradeen. She breathes hope and courage into marriages by speaking to groups of women. For interest in her ministry contact her at City Life Spokane. Have a message? Check out the guest post guidelines.

Abstract Marriage

I always thought that abstract art was an excuse for untalented, wanna-be artists, but I have been converted. As I twisted my head and closed one eye, a black funnel emptying into a mess of fiery reds became a beautiful mountain that touched the colorful sunset sky.

viewpoint

Viewing abstract art is a lot like viewing marriage. (Tweetable)

What normally looks like underwear left on the floor, dishes by the couch, and toilet paper that never makes it into its proper holder is really beauty in action. Even my husband’s lack of appreciation for inspired cuisine void of red meat and carbohydrates as well as his inability to distinguish a face cloth from a dish rag is wonderment.

I’ll admit these things alone leave me wanting. Yet, I have learned that their beauty can only be seen when they come together on the canvas of love, respect and acceptance.

The beauty of marriage comes together on the canvas of love, respect and acceptance. (Tweetable)

Marriage Masterpiece

I have grown to love abstract art so much that I now have a masterpiece in my home.

Marriage Masterpiece

  • The man whose underwear and dishes I’ve been picking up for twenty-four years is the same man who has worked three jobs at times so that I could stay home with our kids.
  • The man who hates shopping is the same man who endures a chick flick and patiently waits on a bench in the mall if I insist he be my shopping buddy.
  • He’s the same man who has what it took to raise my boys into men even when I had to bite my mama-bear tongue in the face of his toughness.
  • The man who rarely cleans a toilet bowl is the same man who prays and seeks heaven’s direction in leading this family.
  • He is the man who bought me small pajamas (from a sporting goods store) because he hadn’t noticed that I don’t wear the same size as I did the day we wed.
  • He’s the one who will skip the raspberry vinaigrette but will drive back to the drive through to get my favorite special sauce that didn’t make it in the sack.
  • He’s the one who still can’t read my mind, but has mastered the art of an agreeable nod when tensions rise.

He is my masterpiece of abstract art.

Second Look Beauty

Some couples wish they had picked differently in their marriage. They’ve become dissatisfied. The bumps and scratches along the years left them disillusioned. The sweet smell of new love has long gone. Left instead is the lingering smell of sour milk.

These moments are the perfect time to head to the art gallery of marriage to tilt our head a little. Tilt it more. Squint. Heck, we can toss our glasses if it helps us find the beauty in our marriage.

There’s beauty in our abstract marriages: a beautiful sunset hidden inside that mess of color.

I will admit however, that some days I squint at the man who is standing on his head, glasses removed, looking back at me.

Notice: No judgement here on messy marriages! WE ALL have them. (Tweetable)

Question: How is your marriage like a disorderly mess of color?  And how can you focus on the masterpiece in your mate?

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